Christmas Eve Dinner圣诞晚餐
“但是骨子里你必须永远做中国人。你必须为自己与众不同而骄傲。如果你因为身为中国人而觉得羞耻，这才是最让人羞耻的……” By Amy Tan[1])
译董力源
I fell in love with the minister’s son the winter I turned fourteen. He was not Chinese. For Christmas I prayed for this blonde-
haired boy, Robert, and a slim new a slim new American nose.
When I found out that my parents had invited the minister’s family over for Christmas Eve dinner, I cried. What would Robert think of our shabby[2]) Chinese Christmas What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners What terrible disappointments would he feel upon seeing not a roasted turkey and sweet potatoes but Chinese food
On Christmas Eve I saw my mother had outdone[3]) herself in creating a strange menu. She was pullin
g black veins[4]) out of the backs of fleshy prawns. The kitchen was littered with appalling mounds of raw food A slimy[5]) rock cod with bulging[6]) eyes that pleaded not to be thrown into the pan of hot oil. Tofu, which looked like stacked wedges[7]) of rubbery white sponges[8]). A bowl soaking dried fungus[9]) back to life. A plate of squid[10]), their backs crisscrossed[11]) with knife markings so they resembled bicycle tires.
And then they arrived — the minister’s family and all my relatives in a clamor[12]) of doorbells and rumpled Christmas packages. Robert grunted[13]) hello, and I pretended he was not worthy of existence.
Dinner threw me deeper into despair. My relatives licked the ends of their chopsticks and reached across the table, dipping them into the dozen or so plates of food. Robert and his family waited patiently for platters[14]) to be passed to them. My relatives murmured with pleasure when my mother brought out the whole steamed fish. Robert grimaced[15]). Then my father poked his chopsticks just below the fish eye and plucked out the soft meat. “Amy, your favorite,” he said, offering me the tender fish cheek. I wanted to disappear.
At the end of the meal my father leaned back and belched[16]) loudly, thanking my mother for her fin
e cooking. “It’s a polite Chinese custom to show you are satisfied,” explained my father to our astonished guests. Robert was looking down at his plate with a reddish face. The minister managed to muster up a quiet burp[17]). I was stunned into silence for the rest of the night.
异步通信After everyone had gone, my mother said to me, “You want to be the same as American girls on the outside.” She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige[18]) tweed[19]). “But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame.”
And even though I didn’t agree with her then, I knew she understood how much I had suffered during the evening’s dinner. It wasn’t until years later — long after I had gotten over my crush[20]) on
Robert — that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the purpose behind our particular menu. For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen all my favorite foods.
14岁那年的冬天我喜欢上了牧师的儿子。他不是中国人。整个圣诞节，我都在为这个长着金发的男孩祈祷，他的名字叫罗伯特，长着一个很别致的、纤细的美国式鼻子。 当我得知父母邀请了牧师一家到家里来吃圣诞晚餐时，我哭了。如果罗伯特看到了我们寒碜的中国式圣诞，他会怎么想？他会怎么看待我那些闹哄哄的、缺乏美国式教养的亲戚们？当他看到的不是一只烤火鸡和甜马铃薯而是“中国菜”时，会多么的失望! 圣诞节前夜，我看到母亲竭力地准备着一些奇怪的菜式。她拔出了肉虾背部的沙线。厨房里乱糟糟地堆满了惊人的大量的生鲜食物：一条粘乎乎的石斑鱼双眼外凸，仿佛正在哀求不要被扔到热油锅里；豆腐看上去像楔状的白橡胶海绵；干蘑菇浸泡在一碗水里面泡发；一盘鱿鱼的背部切着十字花刀，状如自行车轮胎。 然后，他们来了——牧师一家和我所有的亲戚——伴随着一阵喧闹的门铃声和一堆皱巴巴的圣诞节礼盒。罗伯特咕哝着打了个招呼，而我装着没看见他。
晚餐让我更加绝望。亲戚们舔着筷子，然后在饭桌上伸来伸去，在一堆盘子里挟菜。罗伯特和他的家人则耐心地等待着人们将大浅盘递给他们。当母亲端出清蒸鱼时，亲戚们很高兴，低声嘟囔着。罗伯特做了一个鬼脸。这时我父亲用他的筷子伸到鱼眼睛下，挟出了鱼眼下面的鳃边软肉，“阿美，你最喜欢吃的！”他一边说，一边把嫩鱼肉挟给我。那一刻，我真恨不得马上消失。
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晚餐快结束时，父亲倾着身子，一边大声地打着饱嗝，一边感谢母亲的好厨艺。“表示满意是中国式的礼貌。”父亲向诧异的宾客解释着。罗伯特红着脸，低头盯着他的盘子。牧师则设法不让自己的饱嗝发出声音。而我在接下来的时间里一直保持着沉默。
待客人都走光了以后，母亲对我说：“你想与外面的美国女孩子一样。”她递给我一份提前的礼物。那是一条米的斜纹软呢迷你裙。“但是骨子里你必须永远做中国人。你必须为自己与众不同而骄傲。如
黑科技事件果你因为身为中国人而觉得羞耻，这才是最让人羞耻的。”
尽管那时我并不同意她的话，但我知道她了解我当天晚餐时的尴尬和痛苦。直到多年以后，我不再喜欢罗伯特了，才真正感激她给我上的那一课和那份特别的菜谱后面的目的。那一年的圣诞前夜，她挑选的食物都是我最爱吃的。
1. Amy Tan：本文作者是美国华裔女作家谭恩美，她的成名作是The Joy
Luck Club(喜福会)，获1989年L.A.Times图书奖及国家图书奖。其他作品有The Kitchen god's wife(灶神之妻)，The hundred secret senses(百种神秘感觉)，The moon lady(月亮夫人)，The bonesetter's daughter(接骨师之女)，The Opposite of Fate(命运的对立面)等。1995年她的作品获得美国最佳散文奖。谭恩美的作品以移民社会中母女、手足之间由于代沟、文化背景和价值观等不同而引起爱怨的复杂感情为其创作基础，将中国传统文化与美国文化融为一体，深受美国不同族裔、年龄及文化教育背景的读者的喜爱。本文节选自The Opposite of Fate(命运的对立面)。
2. shabby adj. 低劣的
3. outdo v. 胜过，在表演或行动中比……做得更多、更好
4. vein n. 脉络，纹理
5. slimy adj. 粘糊糊的
6. bulging adj. 膨胀的，凸出的
7. wedge n. 楔子
8. sponge n. 海绵
9. fungus n. 菌类，蘑菇
外蒙古
10. squid n. 鱿鱼，乌贼
11. crisscross v. 做十字记号
路面12. clamor n. 喧闹，叫嚷
13. grunt v. 咕哝着说出
14. platter n. 大浅盘
15. grimace v. 做鬼脸
专用小学生校车安全技术条件
16. belch v. 打嗝
17. burp n. 饱嗝儿
18. beige adj. 浅褐的，米的
19. tweed n. 斜纹软呢，斜纹软呢服
20. crush n. 热恋，通常是一时的迷恋
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