需要避免的十种负面思维模式

需要避免的十种负面思维模式

正如我们会形成行为方式上的习惯一样，我们也会形成思维方式上的习惯。有时候这些习惯是正面的，在生活中能够帮助我们形成更好的人际关系，取得更大的成就。另一些时候，我们习惯的思维模式对于我们自身的心理健康、人际关系，甚至是我们身边的其他人，会造成破坏性的影响。

这些有毒的思维模式通常由对我们的现实的扭曲组成，心理学专家称之为认知扭曲。并且我们在某种不同的程度上都具有这一问题。但是当这些模式成为习惯时，它们导致的不只是困扰，还有彻底严重的心理和情绪上的难题。

关于认知扭曲，最有趣也是最可怕的地方在于，我们通常辨别出它们。原因在于，当它们变成习惯性之时，也就变得无意识了。大量研究表明，这些无意识的思想确实对我们的心情、状态和对生活的一般观点负着责任。通过学习去辨别这些无意识思想，消除认知扭曲和重构它们以使其在本质上产生正面影响，我们完全可以创造出一个令人满意和愉快的现实。

为什么无意识的思想的力量如此强大？

-------------------------------------------------------

无意识的思想很可能起源于大脑中几乎直接负责情绪的部分——杏仁核（脑区）。这是我们大脑中最原始的区域，我们久远的祖先依靠它来决定在感知到威胁时，是逃离还是站出来战斗；这也被熟知为对于危险是“抵抗或逃跑”的反应。毫无疑问，杏仁核和它的超快的反应能力是我们人类存活和进化的主要原因。没有它，我们就是利齿如刀的老虎们小猫似的食物。

杏仁核的反应是如此之快以至于它们几乎是无意识的。当它点燃在我们的大脑中点燃认知扭曲的无意识思想时，我们第一件经常辨别到的事情，是一种生理感觉，像急促呼吸、绷紧肌肉、体温上升、脉搏急促，等等。经常地，我们甚至认识不到真正的想法或者自言自语，这是对于发生在我们周围的一切事情的在生理和心理上逐步增强的反应。对于面对着一头老虎的穴居人类来说，这是件很健康有益的事情。对于现代人来说，在大多数情况下，当我们被杏仁核劫持时，由于我们的反应常常是不适当的，通常这便是不怎么健康的了。

为什么无意识的思想这么强大的另一个原因是，它们不是起源于潜意识，便是直接联系着潜意识。我想争辩的是，由杏仁核引起的快速的情绪反应，事实上是由潜意识产生的。自言自语产生在最初的无意识的反应之后，如果最初的无意识反应是认知被扭曲，情绪反应逐渐增强，则可能不是起源于无意识；然而它常常是如此地难以显而易见，以至于它必须至少架起一座通往潜意识的桥梁。

换句话说，无意识思想如此强大的原因，是因为我们通常不具备意识觉知，不能控制它们。它们在我们的无意识中直接作用，控制了我们对于环境的情绪和生理上的反应。甚至更为强大的是，潜意识实际上创造了我们对于身周世界的认识。它创造了我们现实的地图，影响着现实的创造。

十大常见的认知扭曲

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

1. 非此即彼。我也称之为“黑或白”的思维。所有事情绝对是好的，或者绝对是坏的。两者之间没有任何东西。

2. 以偏概全。你倾向于看待任何单一的负面的事情，作为永久的消极模式。如果一件不好的事情发生了，这个世界就明显地即将结束。

3.否定正面思考。你不能接受任何正面积极的事情发生。如果有好事发生了，你总是到办法将它转变为负面消极的事情，或者解释为什么它是一次侥幸，或者为什么它不值一提。

4. 感官过滤。你过滤了事物的所有好的品质，以使你可以关注在消极方面。用这种方法，所有事情都变得消极。

5.过早下结论。你变成了一个揣摩别人心思的人，一个算命先生。你用消极的方式解释一切事情，但并没有任何支持的证据。

6.夸大或缩小。你把次要的事情夸大到失去原来的比例，并且最小化正面积极的事情。

7.情绪推理。你让你消极的情绪和感觉来反映确切的现实。如果你感觉很坏，那么所有事情都是坏的。

8.“本应该”的陈述。你试着将世界塑造成你的版本的现实，而不是接受真实世界的现实。一个人际关系中很常见的版本是：“如果他（她）爱我，他（她）就不应该……”

9.乱贴标签。极端的以偏概全。你事实上相信以偏概全，并在脑中将它们现实化。

10.个人化。甚至是感知到最为轻微的指责之时，你也变得非常防备。

我们如何控制认知扭曲

------------------------------------------------------------

在杏仁核的无意识的反应于现代社会对我们仍有益处的时候，这些反应会导致我们反应过度，或者反应得不适当。这就是为什么我们大脑的另一部分——眶额前脑皮层（OFC）——会随着我们进化成社会人而发展。OFC是理性的大脑，它使我们避免对普通的压力和挑战产生过度的反应。通常它能使杏仁核受到抑制。

但是我们必须努力使OFC发挥作用，它对我们环境的反应通常不像杏仁核一样无意识和迅速。发展一种认识到无意识的自言自语（思想）的习惯的最好的方法，是在第一个信号——情绪在你体内涌上来之时，有意识地思考一下通过你的大脑的想法。这第一个信号通常是生理上的，正如上文所述。

当你第一下认识到你的呼吸正在变得急促短浅，或者你的体温正在上升，或者脉搏正在加速等等，停下来，深呼吸一次，或两次三次，知道你觉得你自己开始冷静下来，并倾听你心中的自言自语。它正在告诉你什么？

之前所讨论的大部分都被囊括进了那十种认知扭曲类别之中。一旦你辨别到你的想法，试着将它们贴上标签。它们是情绪推理、小题大作、个人化，还是另外一种认知扭曲？当你知道它们是什么时，接着就用冷静的思维衡量它们。让你的OFC通过把逻辑和理性带入那些思维模式之中，来尽到它的职责。

随着时间的推进，你会变得非常擅长辨别和冷却那些热烘烘的无意识思想。通过做这些，你将会成为一个更有成效的难题解决者，和一个更快乐的人，因为你原本只有半杯满的现实将被充实填满。

10 Negative Thinking Patterns to Avoid

(This post was written by Chris Akins of ChrisAkinsdotCom. )

Just as we form habits in the way we act, we also form habits in the way we

think. Sometimes these habits are positive, and help us form better

relationships and achieve greater success in life. Other times our habitual

thinking patterns can be damaging to our own mental health, to our

relationships, and even to others around us.

These toxic thinking patterns are usually made up of thoughts that distort our

realities, or what mental health professionals call cognitive distortions. And we

all have them to some degree or another. But when these patterns become

habitual they can lead not only to inconveniences, but outright serious mental

health and emotional problems.

The interesting, and scary, thing about cognitive distortions is that most often

we don’t even recognize them. That is because when they become habitual,

they also become automatic. There is a great deal of research that shows that

these automatic thoughts are actually responsible for our moods, states, and

general outlook on life. By learning to recognize these automatic thoughts,

eliminating cognitive distortions, and reframing them to be positive in nature,

we can literally create a more fulfilling and enjoyable reality.

Why are automatic thoughts so powerful?

Automatic thoughts probably originate in the part of the mind that is most

directly responsible for emotions – the amygdala. This is the most primitive part

of our mind, the part that our distant ancestors relied on to decide whether to

flee a perceived threat, or stand and fight; also known as the “fight or flight”

response to danger. The amygdala, and its super fast reactionary responses is

undoubtedly a major reason why we humans survived and evolved. Without it,

we would be kitty food for that sabre toothed tiger…

The reactions of the amygdala are so quick that they are for all intents

automatic. The first thing we often recognize when it fires cognitively distorted

automatic thoughts into our mind is a physical sensation, like rapid breathing,

muscles tightening, temperature rising, rapid pulse, etc. We often do not even

recognize the actual thoughts, or self-talk, that is escalating the physical and

emotional reaction to whatever is happening around us. For a cave man facing

a tiger, this is a very healthy thing. For modern people, in most situations, this

is not usually very healthy as our responses are often inappropriate when we

are hijacked by the amygdala.

Another reason why automatic thoughts are so powerful is they are directly

linked to, if not originated by, the unconscious mind. I would argue that the

rapid emotional responses caused by the amygdala are actually the generated

by our unconscious mind. The self-talk that happens after the initial,

unconscious response, which if it is cognitively distorted, escalates the

emotional reactions, may not originate from the unconscious but it is often so

hardly noticeable that it must at least form a bridge to the unconscious mind.

In other words, automatic thoughts are so powerful because we typically do not

have conscious awareness or control over them. They act directly within our

unconscious, which controls our emotions, and our physical responses to our

environment. Even more powerful, the unconscious mind actually creates our

perceptions of the world around us. It creates our maps of reality, in effect

creating our reality.

The 10 most common cognitive distortions

The following is a very brief summary of the 10 most common cognitive

distortions.

1.

All or nothing thinking. I also call this “black or white” thinking.

Everything is all good, or all bad. There is nothing in between.

2.

Overgeneralization. You tend to view any single negative thing as an

eternal pattern of negativity. If one bad thing happens, the world is

obviously coming to an end.

3.

Disqualifying the positive. You can’t accept anything positive ever

happening. So if something good happens, you always find a way to turn

it into a negative thing, or explain why it was a fluke or it doesn’t count.

4.

Mental filter. You filter out all good qualities of something so you can

focus on the negative. In this way everything becomes negative.

5.

Jumping to conclusions. You become a mind reader and a fortune

teller. You interpret everything in a negative way without any supporting

evidence.

6.

Catastrophizing or minimization. You blow minor things out of

proportion, and minimize positive things.

7.

Emotional reasoning. You assume that your negative emotions and

feelings reflect actual reality. If you feel bad, everything is bad.


Should statements. You try and mold the world to your vision of reality,

instead of accepting the world’s reality. A very common version of this in

relationships is, “If he (or she) loved me he (or she) wouldn’t ….”

9.

Labeling and mislabeling. Overgeneralization in the extreme. You

actually believe the overgeneralizations and make them reality in your

own mind.

10.

Personalization. You take things personally. You become very

defensive at even the slightest perceived criticism.

8.

How we can control cognitive distortions

While the automatic responses of the amygdala can still be of benefit to us even

in modern society, these responses can lead us to overreact, or react

inappropriately. This is why another part of the brain, the orbital frontal cortex

(OFC), developed as we evolved into social beings. The OFC is the rational mind.

It’s the part of the mind that keeps us from overreacting to ordinary stress and

challenges. It keeps the amygdala in check… usually.

But we must make an effort to actually engage the OFC. It does not often

respond to our environment as automatically or as quickly as the amygdala

seems to. The best way to start developing a habit of recognizing your

automatic self-talk (thoughts) is to consciously think about the thoughts that

are going through your mind at the very first sign that emotions are welling up

inside you. This first sign is usually physical, as discussed above.

When you first recognize that your breathing is becoming rapid and shallow, or

your temperature is rising, or your pulse is rising, etc., STOP. Take a deep

breath, or two or three, until you feel yourself start to calm down, and listen to

your inner self-talk. What is it telling you?

Most likely a large portion of that talk will fall into one of those 10 cognitive

distortion categories. Once you can recognize the thoughts, try and label them.

Are they emotional reasoning, catastrophizing, personalization, or one of the

other cognitive distortions? Once you know what they are, then counter them

with a “cooling” thought. Let your OFC do its work by bringing logic and

rationale into those thinking patterns.

With time you will get very good at recognizing and cooling those hot automatic

thoughts. In doing so you will become a more productive problem solver, and a

much happier person as your reality will be filled with glasses that are half full.

Author Bio: Chris Akins is the author of the personal development

blog ChrisAkinsdotCom. You can follow his blog and learn skills for successful

living that Chris shares with all his readers.